The 1977 moviedid they make that movie? How did they make it look so real?
During this time, I worked with youth and was privy to parental chatter about the Star War movies and other issues that caused apprehension among parents. I was also a new mother, and so I listened intently to their questions and concerns. Was it ok that junior saw Star Wars and Return of the Jedi seven times each? Was it ok for them to see those movies at all? What about Darth Vader? Was he too evil to watch? Would this introduce their children to a new “religion”?
Nearly twenty nine years later, I am still privy to parental chatter about their concerns regarding all of this technology stuff. It seems like every year or so another new technological advancement pops up in our culture, and once more, we’re captivated. Ten years ago it was email: when people were signing up for email accounts by the millions, parents were again concerned about their children. Was it ok to give their teen their own email account? How could they monitor their email conversations or access to ungodly internet sites?
Five years ago, it was cell phones: was it ok for their children to have one in high school, or should they wait until college? How could their child’s conversations, contacts, and minutes be monitored? What if their child gave out their cell number to the wrong person?
Today, it’s MySpace.
For those who don’t spend hours and hours online, MySpace is one giant blog – now over 40 million people big – where mostly young people say whatever they want to say, however they want to say it, and in whatever form they choose, including pictures. Facebook, which requires a college email address for access, are not far behind.
The mastermind behind
This has created two very serious problems.
First, although Allegedly, the rule is this:
Share your photos to let friends and other members see who you are. Photos may not contain nudity, sexually explicit content, violent or offensive material, or copyrighted images. Do not load images of other people without their permission. If you violate these terms your account will be deleted.
Oh, really? When I recently visited several sites of teens I know from local high schools, I found – with no restraints and the click of a button – soft-porn pictures, violent images, cursing, and foul and degrading language in abundance on some of these sites. And safe? On some sites, girls actually gave detailed directions on how to get to their houses, or listed their cell phone numbers so they could be reached anytime, anywhere.
One example of the problems raised by such openness came in this report from NBC News:
Police in
Unfortunately, these are not isolated cases. One Internet safety specialist said that for a pedophile,
So MySpace isn’t always fun and safe. Secondly, just like with internet and email use, MySpace account quickly, kids often feel the need to check their account several times per day to see if there are any new postings. One young lady, a Christian, remarked to me,
“I can’t wait to see what my friends have said about me or to me, so I go onto my account probably 10 times a day, at least! If someone’s said something nice to me or left a fun picture, it just makes my whole day. But if [my friends] say something mean or sarcastic to me, well, it can make me really grumpy and sad.”
Because over 87 percent of children in
So, is MySpace “bad”? Have I been telling parents to delete their children’s accounts? Well, the answer to those questions is both “yes” and “no.” The advice I give parents about MySpace or Facebook is, in fact, the same that I have been giving them about the internet, email accounts, and cell phone use for over a decade now, and that is this: Parents, be good, godly parents! Know your children! If you, as a parent, are not thoroughly involved in your child’s life in the area of computer use, then for goodness sakes, pull the plug. Delete that MySpace account immediately. If, however, you know intimately what goes on with your child, then prayerfully consider if MySpace – or Xanga, FaceBook, Friendster, or personal blogs – are appropriate for your family. Ask yourselves the following questions to help with your decision making:
1) What is your child’s purpose in having a MySpace (or other blog) account? Do you consider it to be worthwhile?
2) Do you have complete access to your child’s account? Do you check the site frequently?
3) Do you know what MySpace accounts your child accesses? Have you checked these sites out? Does your child know what sites or blogs are allowed, and which ones are forbidden?
4) Is your child using the block feature, only allowing those friends that they (and you) know well, and who you consider to be responsible friends, to access their site?
5) Has your child refrained from listing any personal information (ie. last name, address, phone numbers, city, etc.) on his/her account?
6) Is your child accessing their account a few times per week, or are they online several times per day for an extended period?
7) Are the postings on his/her account fun, friendly, and God-glorifying, or does the commentary fall under the category of “unholy” or “useless drivel”?
Technology in of itself is not bad, but when parents hand their children over to its trappings and do not monitor, control, govern, and enforce boundaries with intimate involvement, guidance from His Word, and love, then just like with anything else – from calling to chatting to courting – your child can be swallowed up on a worldly path that can bring heartache, devastation, and destruction.
Parents, get online and check out MySpace.com. Find out if your child is blogging. Get details. Discuss. Ask questions. Ask more questions. Make decisions as to whether or not you want your children on these sites at all. Set boundaries, whatever your decisions, and then consistently enforce them. Stay involved. Pray, pray, pray.
Then go rent Star Wars and watch it together.
Proverbs 2:11: “Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.”
Philippians 4:8-9: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me-put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”
Romans 12:2: “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
With her husband, Barb Thomas has raised three terrific kids. She has long worked with teens and their families and today heads Barbara Thomas Biblical Counseling. She attends Bear Creek Church in Medford, Oregon.